Sunday 27-6-10: “What a life!”

At 07:32, the Old Man sounded well-rested.
Searching for dispersible aspirin, he offered amlodipine.
“Dispersible aspirítin.”

He drank the dissolved dispersible aspirin, and I told him to look for lansoprazole. After a long pause, he asked:
“What do you want now?” He started reading a label:
“Fifteen milligrams…castro…[i.e. gastro]…lansópracazole.”
He swallowed the lansoprazole, but couldn’t find the bendroflumethiazide. Then there was a longish search for the Normulen package. Finally:
“Do you mean ‘Normulen’?” — he had found it.
He said he had swallowed a half-tablet of gliclazide.
The Old Man found the amlodipine. Then it became clear that he hadn’t swallowed the half-tablet of gliclazide. I told him to swallow both that and the amlodipine.
He searched for levothyroxine. After a long pause he asked:
“Anything else?” Then there was another long pause. He found the levothyroxine and swallowed a tablet of it.
“What a life!” he commented.
Searching for co-codamol, he told me:
“I’ve found it straight away.”
“These are whopping big ones.”
He swallowed 2x co-codamol. Our phone-call ended at 08:09.
At 17:38, the Old Man had not heard that England had been knocked out of the World Cup by Germany.
At 20:11 I phoned the Old Man and asked him to look for the blue-top and red-top bottles. There was a very long pause. At 20:21 he rang off; I rang back.
He found the cod-liver-oil and the multivitamin, and I told him to swallow them. I think he did.
“I’ve lost my teeth,” the Old Man said. I replied that that wouldn’t prevent him from swallowing tablets.
“I must have left them in the bedroom.”
I told him sharply to concentrate on the matter in hand.
He found the simvastatin, and swallowed one.
Searching for ferrous sulphate, he complained:
“I don’t know where I am now.”
I asked him a question, and repeated it several times, but received no response until he said:
“Wait a minute, and don’t shout at me!”
The Old Man said he had found a tablet, but his description revealed that it was a lansoprazole capsule. He didn’t find the ferrous sulphate. We moved on to the co-codamol.
“I’ve got that,” said the Old Man almost at once.
He wanted to swallow the lansoprazole with the co-codamol. I said not to.
Our phone-call ended at 20:49.

[Original posting 27 June 2011]

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